First Love
by Krazee Kaz
Summary: Has Hi-Ho found the woman of his dreams?
1. Prologue

**LONDON'S BURNING**   
First Love 

PROLOGUE 

_Main Characters: Hi-Ho, Kirsty._   
_Disclaimer: Hi-Ho, Adam, Hyper and Pearce belong to LWT, other characters are copyright to me._

**Hi-Ho**

How wrong can you be about a woman? You think they are they one, but they have other ideas. Other men with more experience probably! I'll have to remember to fall in love with the inside and not the outside next time… 

Perhaps I should try another blind date. Is it possible to make another mistake? Probably knowing my luck! How do you get on Blind Date…? 

Maybe if I stick with the setup thing I will find the right woman (eventually!). And hopefully get some practical experience along the way. Usually an advantage to have experience behind you. Unfortunately, I'm a bit lacking in that department at the moment! 

The girl for me would have to be something special, we'd have to share stuff. Have a laugh and understand each other, all-important stuff like that. How do you go about finding the woman of your dreams? The mother of your children (in the very distant future!)? A girl who stands out in the crowd… 

Will she ever come my way? Am I destined to be alone forever?   
  


**Kirsty**

I always reckoned I was too busy with work to find a man. The real reason was that I felt I wouldn't know what to do. How to go about it. Would I ask him? Or wait for him to ask me? 

Why is it that all the nice men are gay? The ones I know are anyway. Either that or they're married. I wouldn't want to break up a marriage. That would be a lucky person who has found some happiness in their lives and are no longer alone. Maybe that will be me one day. Treat other people how you want to be treated. 

I want a man who can make me laugh, who can understand me, who will know me better than anyone, a man who won't keep secrets, lie or cheat. If that's at all possible… 

Where could I find such a man? I meet lots of people in my job. I deal with different people everyday. None of them are right. I work with Naz, he's a mate not boyfriend material. I don't feel anything other than friendship towards him. He's my work colleague not a lover. No offence to him or anything! 

How can I find a man that stands miles in front of others? Will I cross his path in my lifetime? Or will I be alone forever, not really a thought that fills me with joy!   


_London's Burning – First Love ~ Prologue © Karen Moody 30/04/2001_


	2. Meeting

**LONDON'S BURNING**   
First Love 

CHAPTER ONE   
Meeting 

**Hi-Ho**

It was like our eyes met across a crowded room. Or more of a crowded accident scene really! She was helping the casualty trapped in his car seat. She was so gentle and put him at ease. She laughed and joked with him as we worked to free him. 

I protected them from sparks as the windscreen was taken away. Suddenly the guy took a turn for the worst. I didn't know what to do, but she acted quickly and was able to revive him, with the help of her colleague. 

They took the bloke off to hospital, I took the opportunity to talk to her. 

"Will he be ok?" 

"Should be now, thanks for your help." 

"Are you being funny?" 

She smiled. "No I meant it. Don't take things to heart!" she closed the doors and the ambulance left the scene. 

I was in love.   
  


**Kirsty**

Dozy idiot. Why did he think I was having a go? He did go into a bit of a tiz when the bloke passed out and went into cardiac arrest. But he didn't panic. He just didn't know what to do, having not had either enough experience or lack of intense training. He's a fireman not a paramedic. Can't have him trying to do me out of a job! 

We met again sometime later. Maybe it was fate! Well that's what he reckoned. I laughed. 

"More like you're following me around!" 

"What makes you think that?" he wondered. 

It was his turn to impress me as he dragged a casualty out of a burning building. I have to admit that I was impressed. I was also impressed by his compassion towards the injured person, who was lucky to only be suffering from smoke inhalation. If you could call that lucky. 

"Bit of an action man really aren't you?" I asked. 

"Would you like to see what else I can do?" 

I grinned. "Maybe." 

"Maybe I could call you sometime" he suggested. 

"And what would you call me?" 

"I meant phone." 

I couldn't help but laugh at him. "You don't know my number" I pointed out. 

"Well maybe you could give it to me" he pressed. 

I raised my eyebrows. "Oh yeah?! I'm sure you'd like that!" 

"I wouldn't mind some mouth to mouth…" 

I smiled. 

I got a pen from my pocket and grabbed his hand. I wrote my phone number down and told him that maybe he'd like to show me his hose someday!   


_London's Burning – First Love ~ Chapter 1: Meeting © Karen Moody 30/04/2001_


	3. The First Date

**LONDON'S BURNING**   
First Love 

CHAPTER TWO   
The First Date 

**Kirsty**

The start to our first date wasn't exactly what I had in mind. His local full of firemen! One of his mates tried butting in, I suggested maybe we could go on somewhere for a meal and a bit of privacy! He agreed. We left the pub. 

He said he was impressed by the way I saved that man's life at the RTA the other day. He said he wanted to be able to do that if the opportunity should come up. I asked if there was anything stopping him and told him that it would do his confidence a big boost. He seemed a little embarrassed by it. 

He disclosed the fact that he still lived with his parents. I joked that if we ever wanted proper privacy then we'd have to go to mine! 

He was kind, gentle, sweet… I wondered what the catch was. He assured me there wasn't one. 

I still couldn't help thinking there was a hidden agenda somewhere. 

After all, most men are only after one thing. Aren't they? One quick shag then you're dumped. Or several shags until they find someone who can do it better… Not that I would know much about it. But once bitten twice shy, and more wary! 

He was good-looking, caring… Everything I was looking for. Can he really be so perfect?   
  


**Hi-Ho**

She was everything I'd hoped for. And more. It was definitely love. I was sure of it. 

I knew she liked me. Even Adam's feeble attempts to chat her up had failed. She said she wanted to go out with me. I was happy to go on somewhere else, away from the prying eyes and ears of Blue Watch, 

I knew they'd try and dig for gossip later. 

I think I may have made a bit of a fool of myself by going all starry-eyed. 

She said she liked the way I pulled that guy out of the fire and said that I could save her any day!!! 

At least there was nothing for me to feel deeply embarrassed about. I didn't spit, drop food, spill wine, or do anything else daft. Which made a change! 

Usually I'm so nervous that everything goes wrong. For once it didn't turn into the date from Hell where I manage to do everything wrong and end up burning the restaurant down. Or something equally embarrassing! 

She put me at ease, just like she did with the bloke in the RTA. She had a natural talent. She was already impressed. I felt I didn't need to prove myself. 

Have I finally found the woman I've only ever dreamed of? Is it possible for her to be so perfect in every way?   


_London's Burning – First Love ~ Chapter 2: The First Date © Karen Moody 30/04/2001_


	4. Uncertainty

**LONDON'S BURNING**   
First Love 

CHAPTER THREE   
Uncertainty 

**Kirsty**

He introduced me to his friends, his work colleagues. He wanted to show me off. I didn't mind. Perhaps I'd introduce him to Naz and my friends soon. 

Since his parents were home, I suggested we go to my flat. I chucked my flat mate, Stacey, out for the evening. 

She grinned when I told her my plans. 

"Oh yeah, quiet night in eh? Candles, romantic music, bottle of wine…." 

"Shut up" I told her. 

She still hadn't gone out when he came round. I knew she just wanted to be nosey. I'd have to repay the favour sometime. 

She beat me to the door. 

"You must be the fireman! Kirsty has told me all about you!" 

He looked a bit puzzled and embarrassed. 

"Come in" I told him, glaring at Stacey. "Just ignore her, she's on her way out!" 

"Am I?" Stacey seemed to be enjoying herself. "Oh yeah! Have fun won't you?!" she winked at us. 

I glared at her and pointed in the direction of the door. Stacey chuckled and left the flat. 

"My flat mate, she's a bit…" 

He smiled. 

"Make yourself at home then. Dinner will be served shortly." 

I let him go into the front room where the table had been set. Stacey had added some flowers and candles, I hadn't had chance to get rid of them. 

He looked uncertain as to what I had in mind. I was uncertain of what I had in mind! I made a hasty retreat into the kitchen!   
  


**Hi-Ho**

I didn't know what she was planning. Did she want a romantic evening? I was sure of it. It was the climax I was unsure of! 

What if she didn't understand? 

I sat down on the sofa and looked around the room as she made herself busy in the kitchen. 

"Smells nice" I tried complimenting. 

She popped her head round the door. "Well I've got a fireman on stand by in case I burn it!" 

"Oh? You won't need me then!" 

She grinned. "Ignore the candles, Stacey's idea of a joke!" 

I seemed relieved by that. But it left me wondering just what she did have in mind! 

"It's a nice touch." 

She just nodded and quickly disappeared again. 

I think I may have said the wrong thing there. I didn't know what she had in mind. I didn't know what I had in mind either!   
  


**Kirsty**

I felt a bit scared now, not knowing what he wanted. Or what I should do. I took a deep breath and took the meal through. 

We ate and chatted about my day, his day, I said my work was pretty boring to talk about, he said his was much the same. We paused, using eating as an excuse not to talk. 

We finished. He said it was a nice meal and offered to wash up. I told him there was no need as we had a dishwasher. He loaded it up. 

I didn't know what to do next. Neither did he. I think I felt a bit relieved by that! But also felt a bit stupid. Maybe I could kiss him… I did but he pulled away. I tried apologising feeling stupid again. 

He said it didn't matter. 

"I have something to tell you" he sounded serious.   
  


**Hi-Ho**

I felt I had to admit to my past experience in the bedroom department, which was easy to list. None. I asked if she minded if we wait, I didn't want to jump straight into bed with her. 

Then I thought that sounded like an insult! But she knew what I meant, she didn't mind. She felt the same! 

We didn't have to get married or anything, just wait until it felt right. 

She totally agreed. I knew she meant it. I was so relieved. A weight had been lifted. Any reservations I'd had about her or the evening had gone straight out of the window 

She was the one, I was sure of it, but I wanted everything to feel right. I wanted to get to know her properly, know all her likes and dislikes. She felt exactly the same. 

I was just so relieved to hear that. 

We settled for snogging on the sofa!   
  


**Kirsty**

Phew! Snogging on the sofa will do fine! Nice and slowly will be perfect! He's so soft and passionate. I lay in his arms, we watched a film. I was relieved that he felt the same way I did. 

The evening was perfect, after the small hiccups! I knew this wouldn't be a relationship where we'd go to bed and I'd never see him again. 

I just knew it wasn't going to work out that way.   


  


_London's Burning – First Love ~ Chapter 3: Uncertainty © Karen Moody 30/04/2001_


	5. Steady

**LONDON'S BURNING**   
First Love 

CHAPTER FOUR   
Steady 

**Kirsty**

We'd been out a few times, leaving our embarrassment in the past. We had fun, a laugh, we clicked. 

But now we felt it was the right time. I knew it was and I'm sure he did. He said it felt right. I've never felt so sure about anything. We kissed. He moved his soft lips around my body, his hands crawled up my back. I felt alive. Then he suddenly stopped. 

"I…er…" he paused. 

"What?" I whispered. 

He didn't seem sure of something. "Was that ok?" 

I smiled. "Don't worry I let you know if I don't like something!" 

He took a deep breath, I looked him in the eyes. 

"We don't have to do it right now, if you're having second thoughts." 

He shook his head. "I love you." 

I smiled, he carried on. 

He unbuttoned my shirt, I did his, he dropped it on the floor. He was about to fall over the bed until I pulled away and grabbed his hand! I think he was a little embarrassed by that! I told him it didn't matter. 

There was never a point when anything felt wrong. Everything was perfect. I reminded him not to try too hard, he promised he'd try not to. We learned from each other as neither of us had enough previous experience to draw from. You never stop learning new things.   
  


**Hi-Ho**

I felt a bit stupid for not knowing what to do. She said she didn't mind, as she didn't know either! For some reason that made me feel better. 

I worried about the light. Should it be on or off? That should have been the last thing on my mind really, I don't know what I was thinking. She turned it off. 

I tried to figure out how to unclip her bra with little success. Who makes these things?! Glad I don't have to wear one really, all that faffing about…. 

She unclipped the garment and it parted from her body and fell to the floor. Her shower fresh body was displayed. I hesitated, mesmerized by her natural beauty. She took my hand gently, I let her guide me. She kissed my hand softly and moved it down her neck. I wandered on to her chest and paused. She put her hand over mine and guided it towards her breast. She let it rest. 

Her own hands were round my back, getting lower as we caressed each others skin. We didn't want to rush into anything. She parted and sat on the bed. For a moment I thought maybe I'd done something wrong. She wanted me to join her.   
  


**Kirsty**

He tried to apologise, but it wasn't necessary, he soon figured that out! I wanted to go further, so did he. He lay back on the bed. I climbed on top of him, we kissed. 

Once he'd found the entrance he crept inside. An explosion by a sudden burst of energy soon followed. I could not hold in my own emotions. If anyone heard it was definitely a cry of pleasure! 

I fell asleep in his warm arms. The condom packet sat by the bed, as it had done all evening, still it remained unopened.   


_London's Burning – First Love ~ Chapter 4: Steady © Karen Moody 30/04/2001_


	6. Meet The Parents

**LONDON'S BURNING**   
First Love 

CHAPTER FIVE   
Meet the Parents 

**Hi-Ho**

It must be getting serious. I'm taking her to meet my parents, which might not be such a good idea! Mum was pleased that I'd finally brought a girl home and kindly pointed out that it doesn't happen very often! Thanks Mum! 

Dad sat in his chair asking Kirsty a load of questions. If he didn't like one of her answers it would be "you are the weakest link, goodbye". 

His first complaint was that she was white. Mum hissed at him to shut up. She shoed him into the kitchen to give him a talking to. I tried to apologise to Kirsty. 

"Sorry about that." 

She smiled. "Don't worry about it." 

But I did. Parents could be so embarrassing when they wanted to be. 

Dad reappeared, he picked up his paper and pretended to read it, still he couldn't resist going for the second round. 

"So have you thought about the future yet?" 

"Sorry?" Kirsty wasn't sure what he was asking. 

"Well marriage and children" he looked at me. "We're not going to get any grand children out of your brother are we?!" 

Mum stood in the kitchen doorway, hands on her hips, and told him in no uncertain terms to shut up! He went back to the paper. 

"Will you be stopping for a bite to eat?" Mum asked, making the effort to be civil and apologise for Dad's actions. 

"Well…." I wasn't sure if that was a good idea. 

In fact I'm certain it wasn't! 

Kirsty interrupted. "We'd love to, thank you." 

Mum grinned. "You're not a vegetarian or anything are you?" 

Kirsty smiled. "No." 

Mum made herself busy in the kitchen. With her out of the way, Dad thought of some more questions he hadn't asked yet. 

"So what line of work are you in then Kirsty?" 

"I'm in the Ambulance Service." 

"What, answering the phones?" 

"No, I'm a paramedic." 

"Really?" 

I wanted the ground to open up. And they wondered why I never brought girls home! 

Dad decided to have another jibe. "I thought it was nurses who fraternized with firemen!" 

I shook my head. I knew it was going to be a disaster. We managed to get through a meal, Dad still kept on asking embarrassing questions when he got the chance, but usually ended up getting a dig in the ribs from Mum who seemed desperate to impress. 

Kirsty suggested doing the washing up. 

"That's a good idea!" Dad told her. 

But Mum glared at him, and wouldn't have any of it. "I'm sure Ronnie can manage" she looked at me. 

"I expect you get enough practice at the fire station!" Dad grinned, Mum glared at him. 

I wasn't sure about leaving Kirsty alone, but she told me to go. I washed up. Mum was pleasant as always, and Dad didn't say anything else, much to my relief! 

But if I thought that was embarrassing, it went like a dream compared to the embarrassment that Kirsty's father caused!   
  


**Kirsty**

I thought Ronnie's parents were very nice people. I told him so later. He seemed surprised that was the impression I'd got! I pointed out that his father was nothing compared to mine! He insisted on meeting my family. I'm sure he regretted it, I know I did! 

My dad wasn't in, fortunately! But my mum was pleased to see me. I could guess where my father was. I keep telling Mum to leave him, but she won't. She reckons I'll understand in a few years. If he was my husband I'd have left long ago. 

He loved the pub and the booze. If he loved her then he had a funny way of showing it. I knew he'd instantly disapprove of Ronnie. 

He was a drunken bigot, he'd never change. It might be an awful thing to say about your own father but it was true. 

Mum remained pleasant and didn't ask anything embarrassing. I was anxious to go before "he" stumbled home. Ronnie didn't understand why I was so edgy as I didn't explain. But he soon found out for himself. 

We were leaving as it stumbled round the corner. 

I rolled my eyes. 

"Is that him?" Ronnie asked. 

"Unfortunately." I replied. "I said you wouldn't want to meet him!" 

"Is he always like that?" 

"You don't want to know, get in the car." 

But it was too late, "It" had clocked him. 

"What's going on?" he slurred, leaning on the car for support. "What do you want?" he looked at me then to Ronnie. "She only comes home when she wants something!" 

"We're leaving" I announced. 

"So where did you pick this one up?" It asked. "Have you been poash… poashing… raiding the curry shops?" 

He didn't know what he was on about. I'd knew he'd try to start something. 

"Ignore him" I told Ronnie. "Get in the car."   
Ronnie looked at It sprawled out over the bonnet making yet another comment about black people. 

"Get in the car" I repeated. 

He did so, I followed. 

It was still leaning on the bonnet when I drove away, he fell to the floor. 

"I am so sorry about that." 

"Is he ok?" Ronnie looked back. 

"I don't care, neither should you. I knew this was a bad idea." 

"You weren't to know." 

"I could have bloody guessed!" 

"Your mum was nice." 

"I've never been so embarrassed!" 

"It was probably just the drink…" 

"Isn't it always?! I expect you'll want to call it off now, me being associated with a racist an all!" 

"You can't be responsible for your father" he pointed out. "He might be a racist and a drunk, but that doesn't change the way I feel about you." 

"Doesn't it?" 

"No." 

He touched my leg, I managed a smile. "Perhaps we should just visit your parents more often!" 

"I'm not too sure about that!" 

I smiled, he smiled. 

I hoped a repeat of the other night was on the cards. He had a twinkle in his eye. I'm just glad he didn't get the chance to start anything with my father! I know I would have done! I wouldn't have blamed him though…   


  
__

_London's Burning – First Love ~ Chapter 5: Meet The Parents © Karen Moody 30/04/2001_


	7. Confiding

**LONDON'S BURNING**   
First Love 

CHAPTER SIX   
Confiding 

**Hi-Ho**

I knew I'd never understand women. One minute they're all over you and the next they've disappeared off the face of the earth! I don't know what's happening. She hasn't called, she's never in when I call, or she is in but won't answer the phone. 

Has she gone off me? Did I do something wrong? I haven't seen or heard from her since… Maybe she wasn't satisfied and doesn't know how to tell me. I'd feel better if she did tell me. At least then I'd know that my performance wasn't up to scratch! 

I found myself doodling on the pad of paper next to the pay phone outside the mess as I listened to her answer phone for what seemed like the millionth time. I hung up. 

"Good morning Hi-Ho!" Ashley breezed past in a cheerful mood. 

At least someone was happy. 

I followed her into the mess. 

"Do you know what's going on with Kirsty?" I asked. "She won't speak to me." 

"I expect she's busy" Ashley conducted a search of the cupboard for some biscuits. 

"For two weeks?!" 

She stopped and looked at me. "Come to think of it, she didn't turn up for training either" she thought. "But I expect you'd know more than me" she grinned. "Being intimate and all!" 

"What?" I wondered if she meant what I thought she meant. 

Had Kirsty been telling people about the special, private, things that had happened between us? 

But Ashley looked a little confused and hadn't got a clue why I was being so defensive. 

"You know the boyfriend-girlfriend stuff? I'll have to get hold of her anyway" she changed the subject. "Before she gets dropped from the team. We can't do without a goalie!" 

"What about me?" 

"I'll talk to her" Ashley promised. "Maybe she just wants some space, it's a girl thing." 

She left and Adam wandered in. 

"What's a girl thing?" 

I shrugged. "You tell me and we'll both know!"   
  


**Kirsty**

I apologised to Ashley. She reckoned I should talk to Hi-Ho. Then I got a lecture from the coach for the football team. He reckoned that if I wasn't committed then perhaps I shouldn't bother coming. 

There was so much I needed to do and nothing that I could face doing at the moment. I couldn't tell Ashley about it, but I felt I could confide in Naz. He didn't seem to mind, but reckoned he wasn't the person to be consulting about relationships! 

"I think it's gone a bit further than that" I confessed. 

We sat in the staff room at the A and E Department of St Hughs hospital, catching a quick cuppa before the next call. 

Naz grinned. "Oh yeah?!" 

"This isn't a laughing matter you know!" 

He saw I was being serious. "Sorry." 

I paused. 

"So are you going to tell me or what?" he asked searching for some tea bags to rob. 

"It was the first time." 

"For you? And I thought you were a woman of the world!" 

I wasn't impressed with his joke, he grinned and commenced another search for some sugar. 

"Well we… we didn't use anything." 

He stopped nicking supplies from the cupboards and looked at me. "Oh?" 

"Yeah oh. I mean I might be worrying about nothing, but…. " I looked at him. "I think I'm pregnant." 

He became serious. "Are you sure? What about a test?" 

I was too scared, I shook my head. "I can't. What if… what if I am?" 

"And what if you're not?" 

"I can't think about it. I can't have a baby." 

I couldn't see myself as a mother at all. 

"You can't run away Kirst. You have to do something. What about your bloke?" 

"I haven't told him. I can't." 

"Well you've told me." 

True. I was biting my fingernail. Naz took my hand and pulled it away from my mouth. 

"I thought you'd given that up?" 

I felt sick. I didn't know if that was through being pregnant or just worrying about it! 

"Tea bag?" Naz offered, pulling one from a plastic bag in his pocket. 

I gave him a puzzled look. "What do you want all that lot for?" 

"Well you know they only have that awful machine stuff at St Marks, I'm sharing resources!" 

I smiled. "They never have any cups either." 

"Ah" he turned back to the sink to find some. 

I smiled again. I knew he could cheer me up. As usual he was right. I had to do something. But I didn't have a clue what!   


_London's Burning – First Love ~ Chapter 6: Confiding © Karen Moody 30/04/2001_

  



	8. Make or Break

**LONDON'S BURNING**   
First Love 

CHAPTER SEVEN   
Make or Break 

**Hi-Ho**

I found myself worrying about her. I saw her at a shout and demanded to know what was going on. 

She apologised and said we needed to talk. I agreed. 

We met up later that evening. I said I was worried, as she hadn't called. 

She blamed work. 

I can't help worrying about her, I tried to tell her that. She didn't want to know and reckoned she could look after herself, I wasn't so sure. I didn't want her to give up her job, but our shifts were clashing and we hadn't seen each other. Was I being selfish or was she just not listening? 

"It's not all about what you want you know" she pointed out. "What about me? You're asking me to give up my job." 

"No I'm not" 

"You are. Would you give up your job?" 

"Well I…." 

"Come on, would you or not?" she challenged. 

I couldn't answer. I knew the answer was no. I knew what I was asking of her. She was asking that of me. I couldn't do it, I don't know why I expected her to. 

She knew the answer anyway. "Do you not think that I worry about you?" 

"But we've not seen each other recently" I tried pointing out. 

"We both have demanding jobs. If either one of us can't live with that then perhaps we should end it." 

"What?" 

"Who do you love more, me or your job?" 

"Maybe you should ask yourself that question." 

"Oh I will. I want to know if you can live with the answer." 

She left. I wasn't too sure what exactly her answer was. Me? Her job? Both? I wanted both. Did she? Could we handle that? I went after her.   
  


**Kirsty**

How can he expect me to do something that he isn't prepared to do himself? We haven't seen each other for a week and already he's jumping up and down. I need a man who can live with my work. I need to be able to live with his work. I can. He has the problem not me. 

Work was the problem. I wanted work to be the problem. I couldn't tell him, I didn't know what he would do. 

We had a row about it, I stormed out. I got into my car and drove away. I noticed him in my mirror. He'd come out after me. I considered going back. He should be apologising to me. I'd wait for him to call. 

He didn't. 

So much for another night of passion. His parents had decided to go out for the evening. I mentioned, jokingly, that he shouldn't be living with his parents at his age! He then suggested we get our own place. I suggested he should move in with me as Stacey was moving out soon. She'd got herself a nice job in advertising and was moving to the States. 

It's all right for some. 

He asked when he'd be able to see me again, I said I didn't know because of his shift patterns and mine. He pulled away, suddenly losing his sexual energy as maybe the reality of the situation dawned on him. 

"We hardly ever see each other these days" he moaned. 

"That's not my fault." 

"I want to be with you all the time." 

"You say the sweetest things" I smiled. 

"I'm being serious. Your job gets in the way. My job gets in the way!" 

"So what do you want me to do about it?" 

"I don't know. All I know is that I want to be with you all the time, and at the moment it isn't working out that way is it?" 

Didn't we need our own space as well? I know I did. I wanted to keep doing my job the same as he wanted to keep doing his. Would it mean the end of our relationship after we'd shared so much? 

The test was positive. After today I thought he didn't want me, he couldn't cope. He didn't want my child. He certainly wouldn't be able to cope. I didn't want to tell him. 

Blaming work was easier than facing the truth. I was probably better off on my own.   


_London's Burning – First Love ~ Chapter 7: Make or Break © Karen Moody 30/04/2001_


	9. Close Call

LONDON'S BURNING   
First Love 

CHAPTER EIGHT   
Close Call 

**Kirsty**

"So when's your wedding then?" I asked joking. 

Naz wasn't seeing the funny side of things this morning. 

"Don't you start." 

He wasn't happy with his parents Asian traditions about arranged marriage, he reckoned he wanted to make his own decisions. I couldn't really blame him, but I knew very little about the situation. 

"Are you going through with it or not?" I pressed. 

"Dunno" he didn't really want to talk about it, I decided to let the subject drop before I put my foot in it somewhere. 

We stopped to get in a quick cuppa from a roadside café and sat on the plastic chairs under the warm sun as it faded slowly towards evening. 

"When am I going to meet your new man then?" Naz turned the conversation around. 

I shrugged. "Dunno." 

"And will there be more wedding bells then?" 

I knew I'd asked for that one. "Not at the moment." 

He grinned. 

A shout interrupted our break.   
  


**Hi-Ho**

How do I know that I am in love? When I can't wait to see her, to hold her, be with her? Be together on our own desert island under a hot sun on a white sandy beach, palm trees swaying in a light breeze…. We shared a dream. 

We hadn't spoken since she stormed off. Should I apologise? 

"Hi-Ho! Watch what you're doing will you?!" Hyper wasn't happy about something. 

I looked down and realised I'd dropped the hose on his foot, Geoff Pearce wasn't to happy either and tumbled out a lecture about damaging equipment. Adam also put in his two pence worth with a jibe about being in love. Not that he knew anything about it. The only person he'd ever really loved was himself. 

Would it be love if I confessed to worrying about her while she's out zooming round in that ambulance? I guess that's just the same as me zooming round in a fire engine! Does she worry about me? 

Maggie reckons she does, she said I shouldn't waste time worrying about what might happen. I can't help it though, you read about things…… 

I tried to apologise. I have to live with it, like she does. I promised I'd try. We made it up.   
  


**Kirsty**

It began to get dark and the street lights tried to light up the dark path where a teenager was lying curled up, it looked like he had been attacked. Naz went immediately to his aid. I saw the gang standing across the road, drinking and shouting. 

I wondered if I should call the police, Naz reckoned we should ignore the gang and concentrate on the casualty. He was right, as usual! I told him he'd make a paramedic one day, he grinned. He tried to check the lad over, but the guy seemed frightened and tried to push his helper away. 

I went to get something from the back of the ambulance as the gang of drunken guys approached. They started a torrent of racial abuse aimed at Naz, he looked up as he found himself suddenly surrounded by a gang of about 10 rough looking men. I couldn't see him, but heard him cry out above the chants of "Paki go home" for the want of anything original. 

I got to the radio to call the police. I felt I had to go in to rescue Naz, it would take a moment, in a drag him out. Would they notice me? 

I took the chance, forced my way though the gang, I felt something hit me. I carried on, it was like trying to fight my way though a jungle. I reached the clearing and dragged Naz away. The young lad took the opportunity to crawl away. 

Ignoring the label of "Paki Lover" I pulled Naz to the safety of the back of the vehicle and managed to fight off the attackers and close the doors. 

They took to rocking the ambulance as I tried to save Naz. He'd been stabbed. I knew what to do, but had to take a moment to compose myself. 

There was a moment I thought the gang outside would have tipped us over, but the thankful sound of police sirens wailed in the distance. The ambulance stopped rocking as the gang dispersed. 

I paid very little attention to my own injuries in my fight to save Naz. I was his only hope.   
  


**Hi-Ho**

I felt angry when I heard what happened. I was worried sick but still angry. I wanted to know why. The police were waiting at the hospital when I arrived. I knew something would happen. I tried to tell her…. 

She seemed fine at first, she'd taken a couple of knocks when saving her colleague. She told me about the baby, I didn't know what to say. I sat with her, she fell asleep but didn't wake up. They rushed her off somewhere and wouldn't tell me what was happening. 

I had to wait in a room. They wanted me out of the way. She loved her job, who was I to make her give it up? I had been selfish for thinking that. She'd put her own life at risk to save a colleague, our argument seemed so futile. 

She would be having a baby, we would be having a baby. A young life, part of her, part of me. A bundle of responsibility. Scary stuff. 

After what seemed like hours, a doctor entered the room and wanted to talk. He told me that Kirsty's knock to the head had been much worse than they'd thought. She'd suffered a brain hemorrhage and was now in a coma. They'd had to perform an emergency operation to relieve the pressure. 

She could die. 

The baby had gone. She should have said earlier. Perhaps she'd been scared. I was scared. She could have told me, I would have understood. I think I would have understood. 

I sat with her for the rest of the night. I called in sick to sit with her. I couldn't leave in case something happened. In case she woke up. I wanted her to know that I was here for her. 

Why didn't she tell me? Why did this happen? Why now? 

Adam popped in and reckoned I needed a break, the nurse said she thought that was a fantastic idea and more or less shoed me off the Insensitive Care Unit! 

I went home. Mum and Dad were waiting anxiously. Mum said Kirsty was such a lovely girl. She reckoned she needed to feed me, I couldn't eat anything. At least Dad had stopped asking about a possible wedding. 

There may never be one now, even if any of us had even thought about it. 

No wedding, no baby, no Kirsty. And I was worried about not being ready for all that… 

I had really found the girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and now she was going to be taken away. It didn't seem fair somehow. 

All I could do was wait.   


_London's Burning – First Love ~ Chapter 8: Close Call © Karen Moody 03/05/2001_


	10. Epilogue

**LONDON'S BURNING**   
First Love 

EPILOGUE 

**Kirsty**

I felt my baby leave me. I was sad but sort of relieved, if that doesn't sound too callous. We weren't ready to be parents. We both knew that. 

If the baby had lived, maybe we would have got married and lived happily ever after. Or would he have run a mile? I know I would have done if I could. I wanted to. 

I wondered who would be there for him if I didn't make it. Who would he have to share things with? Special things. Who would understand him? What would he do? Would he find someone else? 

It was my decision. Should I stay or was it time to leave?   
  


**Hi-Ho**

She had saved someone's life at the risk of her own. She's never thought about that. She was brave. I would have preferred a wimp who could be with me now. 

What am I talking about? No I wouldn't. I love the brave, funny, kind and caring Kirsty. I'm the hesitant one. She'd take my hand and we would both jump in together. 

I met Naz, her colleague. He felt he owed her something. He said I was lucky to have found the best woman there was. 

She was sat up in bed when I went to see her. She seemed to be much better, she'd got dressed for starters. She smiled when I presented her with a big bunch of flowers. I replaced the wilting flowers with the fresh new ones. 

"You'll have to move those" she told me. "They're not allowed on the ward, they're a health hazard!" 

I was a bit puzzled. "Oh?" 

She smiled weakly. I sat on the bed with her. 

She looked at me. 

"I wasn't ready for a baby." 

"To be honest" I admitted. "Neither was I." 

"But what if it had happened?" 

I took her hand. "Don't worry about that now. We'll just have to take more care next time!" 

She nodded. 

We both knew there would be a next time.   
  


**Kirsty**

I made the right decision. Just as I made the right call when I went to save Naz. He was alive and that was down to me. I tried to be modest about it, after all it was all part of the job. 

Naz came to thank me personally. I was having some physio at the time. My left side had been weakened by damage to my brain. Apparently I'd been hit with a brick! Nice area, will have to remember to visit there more often! 

I was beginning to get frustrated with the exercises when Naz appeared. 

"You don't make the world's best patient do you?" he grinned. 

I was pleased to see him. "Hiya." 

He sat down. "How are you?" 

"Getting there. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm getting there." 

He smiled. 

"So how are you?" I asked. 

"I'm fine. Thanks to you. I'm sorry for… well for what happened." 

"It wasn't your fault." 

He paused. "I'm going to take my paramedic exams." 

"Good for you." I was pleased for him. 

"I owe it to you." 

"You don't owe me anything." 

"I think I do." 

Ronnie arrived at that point. Naz stood up. 

"Well I'd better be going." 

"Good luck with everything." I told him. 

"And you" he replied before leaving. 

Ronnie sat down and took my hand. I felt tired. I lay down. 

"Do you still want to go out with me now I'm a cripple?" 

"Don't be stupid" he told me. "You're not a cripple. You're still the same Kirsty I fell in love with. Do you still feel the same for me?" he wondered. 

"Course I do." 

He squeezed my hand. "I'll tell you what, when you get out of here, we'll go on holiday together. To the desert island and sandy beach." 

I smiled. "Yeah I'd like that." 

He smiled and held my hand until I fell asleep.   


_London's Burning – First Love ~ Epilogue © Karen Moody 03/05/2001_


End file.
